


Time of Day

by LM1837



Category: ATEEZ, Atiny
Genre: ATEEZ - Freeform, Angst, Beautiful Sunset, Depression, Hongjoong, Hongjoong with a commercial worthy smile, Hopeful Sunrise, Island life, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Seonghwa with celestial eyes, Slow Burn, Slow Burn But Good Burn, Things can hurt so hold your heart, Time Of Day, seonghwa, seongjoong
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-22
Updated: 2020-09-05
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:29:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 17,894
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25446157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LM1837/pseuds/LM1837
Summary: Hongjoong is a highly revered producer with numbered days, wishing to see a hopeful sunrise. While Seonghwa is a sentimental artist with way too much time in his hands, aiming to see the last beautiful sunset. Wherein they meet in an island they both thought they exclusively booked.“I’m sorry. It must be me waiting for the last chapter of this magnificent life that I say so many things. I’m not normally like this.”“It’s also the fact that you and I don’t actually know each other aside from Naver info. It gives you the feel that you can say as much as you want. A stranger won’t care much right?”If you want to feel wrecked and comforted, this will give you that kind of baggage.You'll admire them but also feel sorry for them. Please read with caution as the story also tackles mental health.
Relationships: Kim Hongjoong/Park Seonghwa
Comments: 29
Kudos: 76





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> *This story came about as I was inspired by the photos of Hongjoong and Seonghwa released on the anniversary of Wave.

“I want him out of my Island”

The red-haired man said in English and in a very unsympathetic tone. Even with those heavily tinted sunglasses, the receptionist felt how his eyes were boring holes against her. The other man in dirty blonde with similar intimidating sunglasses scoffed, tilting his head to the side.

“Excuse me? Your island? This property, I book for me. Only”

Dirty blonde hair guy manages to say and proceeds to lean over the reception counter, asking the receptionist to verify what he just said. The red-haired man mutters something in his native tongue and that is when the other picks up that they both speak the same language. A minute later the head manager of the property chimes in to amicably settle the double-booking mishap, with a thousand sorry and multiple apologetic bows it was settled. The island’s two biggest villas will be used, Hongjoong gets the property at the top hill while Seonghwa will reside by the beach manor.

“I want a half refund”

“Yes, refund. Me too.”

Hoongjoong condescendingly removes his sunglasses as if to emphasize his annoyance before he hops to his electric cart. While Seonghwa swiftly takes his keys.

**\--------**

Seonghwa has been enjoying his solitude in such a huge manor, the Greek revival architecture does suit his taste, white, plain, and clean looking. Even on such a trip his diligence takes him to his usual routine. He would still wake up at such an early hour, people of his age would probably call this time unreasonable to be awake. They say that gods do not create perfect human beings as to allow a better flow of life on earth. But having such a prepossessing face, exceptional household skills and a multitude of other astounding talents, Seonghwa is indeed an unfair creation of thy heavens.

He moves to the kitchen and decides to prepare his breakfast instead of calling in for food. He made a simple meal for one person. Flipping the eggs, Seonghwa chuckled a bit, remembering a good moment with a close friend.

“Yeah. Never again will I let Yeosang go near a fry pan again”

He smiles to himself but lets out a long audible breath.

The ideally plated breakfast was taken to the outside dining, overlooking the vast sea. Listening to just the sound of the waves, Seonghwa finds it a bit unsettling. Usually his summers were loud, vibrant, and thronged from all his schedules plus the staff that goes with him. But this summer was meant to be different, this summer was for him and him alone. He looks over to the eastern part of the island as he takes a sip of his Orange Juice placed in such an elegant crystal goblet.

Sitting by the cliff was the Top Hill Villa, every morning he would see a man standing by the hill and today was no different. The red haired, ill-tempered shortie, as Seonghwa would describe him, would always be there, basking in the morning light. His red hair was very bright Seonghwa swears it can only be him.

At noon Seonghwa checks his laptop, reading through his inbox and looking for a specific e-mail. He picks up his glasses and takes out piles of documents from his Keepall Bandoulière in Damier Graphite. Defeatedly placing his face in his palms, Seonghwa gets a bit frustrated with all the documents that he needed to secure and finish. So much files, such a waste of paper.

Seonghwa leaves the study room and moves downstairs.

**________**

Days at the Top Hill Villa were indeed warmed by the sun while nights were adored with cold stars. Hongjoong places his whiteboard marker down, looking at his enormous board, his eyes glimmer. A little break from his diagram making, slash thoughts planning meeting with himself could give him more ideas. He picks up an over-sized merino wool cardigan with stripe details and proceeds to the open living room. It was starting to get dark and he knew better that his favorite spot would give him chills if he does not layer up. Hongjoong is pretty used to being by himself, his successfully produced songs were oftentimes created when he isolates himself. At his age he was no longer introduced as a musical prodigy, he is already revered by a lot of people in the industry. Songs By Hongjoong were numbered but every single one of them was second to none. He takes feelings and emotion in everything that comes into his life, as it happens this modern architectural art he lives in at the moment gives him the urge to allow his creativity to take form. Quite a number of times he had told himself to take it easy. He promised, he will not write a song. No, not anytime soon, not even on this trip.

He rests by the hanging spherical glass chair, cooping up with the fluffy mattress. The chair gently spins to which Hongjoong kinda enjoys, he gets a full panoramic view of what seems to be a limitless sky. He hits the control button and the glass walls slowly enclose his home. As his chair faces the west, he sees a man lounging near the pool down the island. He knew it was the guy who also booked the whole resort. Hoongjoong rolls his eyes, thinking what could prompt such a man to essentially rent an entire island for himself. Show off, he thinks. But he also wonders why would he be at that same spot every dusk?

The window blinds soon follow, slowly rolling down. Hongjoong raises his hand in front of him, allowing the last golden light to trickle off his skin. Right then he notices his pinky.

“Oh, my polish had been washed off?”

Walking to the studio, He takes out one of his ecobags filled with his customizing tools and materials. He props himself to the ground, reaching for a nail polish. Hongjoong chooses an Ultramarine blue, a color bearing the meaning “beyond the sea”. He smiles and reminds himself how he was scared that his dreams were so big even from the start. He wanted his works to go beyond borders, beyond seas and beyond the barrier of language. And he did. Hongjoong never aimed for something small and so his reality became far better than his dreams.

**\--------**

The sky soon fell dark and Hongjoong took a little nap after his a tiny painting session. By the time he woke up it was a minute beyond dinner time. Squinting his eyes from the house lights, he went to the nightstand and picked up the phone.

“What’s the number for the food service again?”

He pauses, and just right at that moment his doorbell rang. Hongjoong makes his way to the entrance and without much thought, he opened the door.

“Good Evening, I hope you haven’t had your dinner yet”

**_Life is controlled by chance rather than design._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things will slowly fall into place. Please keep your patience and hold your heart.


	2. Chapter 2

“What’s the number for the food service again?”

He pauses and just right at that moment his doorbell rang. Hongjoong makes his way to the entrance and without much thought, he opened the door.

“Good Evening, I hope you haven’t had your dinner yet”

Right in front of him was a guy in a somewhat awkward smile, dirty blonde hair, clad in a dark blue cotton polo in the famous interlocking G patch. The same guy he called show off a while ago. Hongjoong raises his eyebrow but the guy only amplifies his smile.

“How may I help you?”

Hongjoong forces a neutral tone.

“The island’s cook isn’t really that good and I don’t think you’re the type to make meals for yourself. Hi I’m Park Seonghwa”

Seonghwa’s celestial eyes were a bit too bright and Hongjoong who was trying his best to be civil was not really in the mood for whatever this person brings or wants.

“I know who you are, and you probably know me too. No need for introductions.”

Hongjoong deadpanned. He hates wasting time, most especially from people like the one who was standing right in front of him. Seonghwa did not care and dismissed such an expressionless note from the ill-tempered shortie. He just carried on, walking inside while carrying a huge crystal bowl filled to the brim with shrimp scampi and a huge portion of focaccia. He looks around searching for the kitchen. Hongjoong trails after him demanding him to leave, threatening a case of trespass, stomping like a little kid. Seonghwa notably responds by giving him a smile and an unexpected chortle.

“I just want to eat dinner with someone”

He finds the pristine kitchen filled with kitchenware of outstanding colors and designs. He makes a remark on how Hongjoong’s kitchen has better dinnerware, appliances, and a sexy stove. By this time, the observing red-haired man did not care anymore, he has no energy to deal with this intruder.

_*Let him do whatever he wants*_

Hongjoong’s inner self says.

Seonghwa was heedful in setting the table. His hands were sure of how and where he would place the articles, even the flower centerpiece was rearranged. Hongjoong stands by the side, crossed arms but in awe of the man’s impeccable table scaping skills. The table looked like those high-end restaurants that Hongjoong loathes, complete with plate chargers, dainty napkins, and a range of utensils, to which you don’t really give much care to use. It felt like those places where you dine more for the reason of status, as a means to say you have the money to pay such overpriced grass.

“Let’s eat?”

They take the seats opposite each other. By now, Hongjoong was looking like a grumpy baby because someone was invading his personal space and his time.

“Sorry these are the only ingredients I was able to ask for, I have yet to ask if they can get me Korean ones.”

Seonghwa gestures for Hongjoong to start eating. Hongjoong takes a portion of the pasta and a slice of bread, he goes in for a bite and looks at the man before him. Seonghwa needed not to ask, he knew it was good.

“I’m both glad and kinda dismayed that you actually recognized me.”

“I heard you do have a huge number of fans. Are you in hiding? Or you think only a few people acknowledge that pretty face? Celebrities tend to act like they aren’t popular when they are on their private rendezvous but gets disappointed if no one actually recognizes them.”

Seonghwa understood what the other meant but decided to focus more on the first part of what Hoongjoong said. Finishing a spoonful of the pasta, he looks at Hongjoong directly in the eyes. Seonghwa’s smile is almost automatic. His smile has always been there, always, for everyone.

“This face is indeed loved by many, quite a good advantage to be honest. It makes me wonder how and why. But I sincerely hope people would pay more attention to my craft than this visual.”

Seonghwa gives out a small laugh in between relief and concern. He continues his words.

“You know it’s been long since the last time I heard a By Hongjoong creation. You hardly ever write songs, but your works were all treasured by many. Loved by both the artist and the listeners. Wow. Are you here to look for an inspiration on your next piece?”

Hongjoong was not liking how this human has been talking. His face could not hide that he was displeased. A smirk emerges in his lips.

“So you want a song from me?”

He derisively asks the man before him whether he wants to sing a song made by him. Hongjoong wonders if this is a set up to reach him, it is not a secret that Hongjoong only makes songs over people he knows. People do not just turn up and ask for a song from him. Arranging his fork on his plate, Seonghwa looks up to Hongjoong.

“Not really.”

Seonghwa unblushingly contested the other man’s words. He further admits he does not even know whether he would still like to have his next album. He says such words still bearing a smile. Hongjoong did not want to believe Seonghwa’s statement but he also felt that this man was not lying.

**\--------**

Despite being the one who brought the food, Seonghwa gladly offered to clean up as a little apology for barging in. After ensuring that all the dinnerware was pretty clean and stacked, he goes around the house uninvited. The house only had one floor, most areas did not even have doors or divisions, they were just wide-open spaces. Seonghwa thought of the place as refreshing and free. He starts looking for Hongjoong, passing by an area to what seems to be a mini studio. Scattered on one side of the floor were art materials and a pair of shoes coated in ink, plastered with so much words, by the wall of the room was a wide whiteboard filled with scribbles and lists. Seonghwa would have thought it was a mathematician’s work if it were not for the big heart at the lower right corner. His cat self felt the curiosity in him strike up and wanted to take a closer look. But he also knew that the probability of him being killed was high knowing the man residing in this house was short tempered.

Seonghwa walks back to the open living room. He presses a button and just then the blinds lifted, allowing him to see the end of the cliff connecting the black and bluish night sky. Hongjoong comes back from his room and sights the taller man spacing out. He clears his throat to get Seonghwa’s attention.

“Sorry I disappeared for a moment. I had to take something. I hope you did not break anything in the kitchen. But thank you for the meal. That is actually surprisingly good.”

Hongjoong looks to where Seonghwa’s eyes has been gazing upon. Seonghwa remains focused on the view, even so he manages to offer his thoughts.

“The scenery here is comely. The sunset probably looks beautiful here as well.”

“The rising sun looks better.”

Hongjoong reveals while the other man faintly smiles before turning to his direction. Seonghwa notices Hongjoong’s eyes, for such an early hour they were already sleepy. Seonghwa did not want to bother this man any longer tonight. Besides, he got to spend dinner with someone. He was already glad about such.

“Thank you for letting me in.”

“As if I actually had a say.”

Hongjoong says. Although Seonghwa, with his fixed smile, thanks Hongjoong for sharing his time and having dinner with him. Hongjoong impatiently walks him to the front door. With both hands inside his pockets, Seonghwa makes his way out.

As Hongjoong was about to shut the door and as the other man was already a few steps away. Seonghwa turns around.

“I’ll come back again tomorrow.”

**_Do resolutions easily change?_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's still pretty slow at the moment but by next chapter we get a little more action.  
> My Twitter is @LM1837 as well. I post there once I'm about to update this fic.  
> Thank you for reading. Have a great day.


	3. Chapter 3

Mid-morning summertime and Seonghwa stops by the island’s kitchen to collect the groceries he had ordered, a collection of fresh fruits, vegetables, seafood, meat, pastas and thankfully some Korean Ramyun. The fresh produce was all divine and pleasing to Seonghwa’s liking. And thank god for electric carts because there was no way he would be able to take all those groceries up the hill. The staff could not help but wonder why there was a need to buy so much food when he was just only one. Seonghwa interjects by asking the staff about the guy from the Top Hill Villa.

“The red hair man. He come down? Here?”

“No, he just orders and ask everything to be delivered to him”

“He always calls for delivery, but recently he doesn’t call that much”

“I heard he owns or has ES-AE-AE”

Such were the replies he got from the island staff. He knew the reason for the lesser calls and the halt of the food delivery, but he wonders if “ES-AE-AE” meant South African Airways. Seonghwa knew Hongjoong’s net worth was incredibly impressive but he never thought it was at this level.

**\--------**

“Yah PABO yah!”

Hongjoong raises his voice as pieces of yellow and green orbs of lemon and lime rolls into the floor, falling from the torn paper bag in Seonghwa’s arms.

“Pabo? You wanna starve??”

Seonghwa’s eyes go wider as he snaps back, a kind of reply that did not really sound like a threat. They start to pick up the fruits that have scattered into the living room then collecting the groceries from the cart and taking them out of the paper bags. The kitchen was full and alive again. Seonghwa delicately washes all the fruits while Hongjoong takes charge of placing whatever needs to be chilled in the fridge. Seonghwa checks to see Hongjoong’s work and complains how the fridge actually looks disorganized.

“This is a mess. I have never met anyone who puts the vegetables at the high shelves except for you.”

Seonghwa nags, making the red-haired man glare back and throw his arms in the air. He retreats allowing the dirty blonde to take charge of the fridge arrangement. Seonghwa in turn obligingly asked Hongjoong to just wash the rice so that he can start preparing their meal.

Seonghwa has been coming over to the Top Villa ever since, he likes to share his meals with the well-known producer. They have had numerous lunch and dinners. Seonghwa prefers to make them at Hoongjoong’s place, just because he says the items there are better and Hongjoong refuses to go out of his Villa. Seonghwa finds it relatively funny that the producer has more diva vibes than the artist. Today as usual they have lunch together. The weather turned up a notch and the glass walls might have turned into a disadvantage as the heat of the sun easily passes through. Setting up the table, Seonghwa never fails to impressively adorn it. Today was like a trip to the Morocco. With those fetching prints sprawling in their table and the watermelon shake in a tall yellow glass, Hongjoong needed not to be called to the table.

“Wow this is really good”

Hongjoong exclaims, displaying his perfectly proportioned smile, the kind you see for dental commercials.

“It got warmer so it’s best to have watermelon, and it actually kinda matches your hair”

Seonghwa reciprocates the smile and starts with his meal. Nothing new here, Hongjoong enjoys whatever the other person prepares. Seonghwa was like a saviour, if Hongjoong continued ordering from the island’s chef he would have just wasted his money. Pouring more shake into Hongjoong’s glass, Seonghwa wanted to ask something more.

“I never saw you outside this villa. The island is beautiful, it is a waste to just stay here. This explains why you have that pale pasty skin.”

Seonghwa has gotten used to Hongjoong’s possible retaliation, but he does not really care anymore. He doesn’t think this man would attack or hurt him anyway, plus pestering him has been fun for Seonghwa. On the other hand, Hongjoong appallingly raises his eyebrow, as is his usual gesture to annoyance.

“Why are you so nosy about other people’s lives?”

“You know I have a Piano down at the Beach Manor.”

Seonghwa mentions the beautiful piano at the upper floor in the Beach Manor to which Hongjoong will certainly like. He excitingly invites Hongjoong to actually step out of the villa and go over his place instead. Additionally, Seonghwa makes excuses that on days that he forgets to ask for the electric cart to be charged and he needs to walk to the top hill villa, his knees would hurt from all the uphill walking. To make things fair he demands that Hongjoong needs to stroll around and drop by the Beach Manor sometime.

“You know, your house here gives the vibe of the house they had in the Twilight movie, mine looks like the house from movie The Notebook.”

“You love movies?”

“I also do love K-Dramas”

**\--------**

On late afternoons that Seonghwa does not go back to his place, he would sit by his favorite spot in Hongjoong’s home, the patio. The view was just as captivating as the open living room. By the Patio Seonghwa can stand on the highest side of the cliff, where the waves hit bigger and stronger. He stares into the open space, eyes free to roam and the mind unrestrained to take rest. He notes that the height of the cliff and the waves here are favorable to drift things afar. Seonghwa puts his dark sunglasses over his eyes and gradually leans back into the lounge chair, closing his eyes, resting his mind, letting some drips of sunlight hit his skin.

A moment later, the little bits of sunlight were completely gone. Seonghwa lifts open his eyes to a Hongjoong blocking the sunlight.

“You want coffee?”

Hongjoong politely offers. Seonghwa moves to sit on the lounge chair instead.

“I prefer to have tea. I am a prince. You did not know? We prefer to have tea in the afternoon.”

“Stop with that bullsht, I know one of your albums has that prince theme. This is cold brew by the way”

Hongjoong shoves the glass to the other man’s hand and takes the seat beside him. He places his drink by the side table and makes himself comfortable in the lounge chairs. Seonghwa does the same. They share the moment of silence and comfort for some good long minutes just listening to the waves hitting the rocks, a few birds chirping and the rustle of leaves as the wind gently blows. 

“I saw a glimpse of your whiteboard. Are you really here for some strategic planning?”

Seonghwa has gotten bolder by the days, he wanted to stick his nose further into Hongjoong’s business. He is not sure what he’ll do with such information, but he asks anyway.

“I want to do more things; I want to do them all and I need to plan all of them carefully without wasting much time. You probably know I support a lot of foundations and try to advocate causes that I strongly believe in. I want to do more of that. I want to continue doing these things and there is so much more that I have not done. But I wanted a recharge, a fresh restart so I gave myself this trip”

Hongjoong said his words with such avidity that the other man who was hearing it could not help but feel in awe. Seonghwa who was still facing the sky, with his eyes closed he tries not to obviously smile.

“And those nail polish in your studio, you use them to paint your pinky finger?”

“Ah this? This is for one of the things I support, The Polished Man Project. It is about an organization which endeavors to raise consciousness about children who are or have been sexually abused. It actually started when the founder Elliot Costello met a young girl named Thea when he went to Cambodia. They became friends over playing games and painting each other’s nails and then the kid divulged the information that she has been sexually abused since she was eight. That is why I keep one of my nails painted, because I support this cause and for moments like this when someone asks me why I have it and I answer the same thing to boost awareness.”

Seonghwa’s heart have melted like butter on a toast. Apparently, the ill-tempered shortie is truly generous and benevolent as some of the articles say.

“And the huge distracting heart in your whiteboard?”

“I want to fall in love deeply. I want to try that real love kind of thing that people sing of.”

Hongjoong nonchalantly declares, these words were totally unexpected. Seonghwa did not expect Hongjoong to be so open about things. The artist softly chuckled.

“Love? It’s not much of a marvelous thing in action to be honest. Some songs sing of unrequited love too”

Seonghwa strongly suggests that there is nothing much to it, but Hongjoong refuses to listen to Seonghwa’s opinion. He insists on wanting to try the cruel world of being madly in love and that maybe that would gift him with another wonderful By Hongjoong creation. Seonghwa slightly lowers his sunglasses to look at Hongjoong, grilling the man that all of this was only to create a new song? The red-haired producer opines that a song is not just a song and he will not be doing it only for the sake of creating a new one. That even though trying such could potentially lead him to wrong directions, he was willing to try it anyway.

“You are never satisfied.”

Seonghwa responds, not pushing his side anymore. But he continues, commending how Hongjoong has that much will and enthusiasm to do things. Where does Hongjoong get that much energy to continue life in such vigor when the world always remains the same. Gently sitting up, Hongjoong realizes how Seonghwa has been questioning him a lot.

“You know I don’t really appreciate your nosy questions, if it weren’t for the food, I would have locked the gates.”

“There are no gates”

“Whatever.”

Hongjoong is back to being short tempered and advances to throw Seonghwa a question.

“How about you? What are you fcking doing here?”

Removing his sunglasses, Seonghwa sits up as well. Taking a moment for himself before he looks at Hongjoong straight in the eyes.

“I wanna see the last beautiful sunset. I wanna die.”

Seonghwa uttered. Hongjoong laughs, loudly, and in a disdainful tone.

“Such a waste. While here I am, wanting to see a hopeful sunrise, because I’m dying.”

**_How do you know if its actually a sunrise or a sunset?_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had fun writing Time of day. And this chapter just kept playing in my mind even before I started writing this.  
> Also, I came about this story because of the Wave Anniversary photos. Update will be next weekend. Hope you had fun reading this, thank you so much for sharing your time.


	4. Chapter 4

“I wanna see the last beautiful sunset. I wanna die.”

Seonghwa uttered. Hongjoong laughs, loudly, and in a disdainful tone.

“Such a waste. While here I am, wanting to see a hopeful sunrise, because I’m dying.”

Both men give the other a wistful smile.

“I was diagnosed with Severe Aplastic Anemia. My bone marrows are too lazy to produce my blood cells.”

“I have Persistent Depressive Disorder; my depression goes on for years.”

Hongjoong and Seonghwa both snickered, in the same annoyed tone and duration.

A minute of silence felt like a lifetime and Hongjoong could not afford to lose more of his time.

“What an ironic life it is indeed, Mr. Park Seonghwa who has everything wants to lose it all.”

His words, Seonghwa felt the paralyzing venom in Hongjoong’s words. The producer was terribly pique. But Seonghwa, today’s Seonghwa, was not taking any crap.

“While, Mr. Kim Hongjoong who has done it all, can’t continue his mission anymore.”

Seonghwa pauses.

“Anyway, I won’t even let the public know that I died if I’m able to pull my plan. I will just simply go missing. But even the fact that I’m missing won’t even get to the news.”

The artist felt how his words could have a pernicious effect on the other man and being someone who knows how words can kill harder than bullets, he suddenly retracts.

“I’m sorry. It must be me waiting for the last chapter of this magnificent life that I say so many things. I’m not normally like this.”

Seonghwa felt anxious, but Hongjoong was not just an ill tempered shortie. He too can handle his cool in this kind of situation.

“It’s also the fact that you and I don’t actually know each other aside from Naver info. It gives you the feel that you can say as much as you want. A stranger won’t care much right?”

The red-haired producer was right. Sometimes it feels easier to open up to someone you barely know. Seonghwa looks at Hongjoong and finally understands those tired sunken eyes.

“Your eyes, they are fairly sleepy again. I guess we have much food to last until tonight. I’m getting some before I leave.”

**\--------**

By the Beach Manor the wind is less harsh, and the pool was a little bit warmer compared to the Top Hill Villa. But the white façade of the Manor keeps the place feeling cool. This morning, Seoghwa felt the need to clean. Despite the house being maintained by the staff, he picked up the dust remover and the vacuum, which to his dismay was kind of outdated. He had the urge to do some cleaning not because the house was dirty, it was because Seonghwa needed some time to clear his mind before he resumes to his paper works. As usual, in the afternoon he burned his time reading, checking, writing, and printing several documents. Seonghwa was never a fan of hard copies but some documents are far too important to stay as digital files. Sieving through the pages, Seonghwa takes one page and places his full sign on it. It made him smile, since when was the last time, he did a fansign? Looking back, he was the kind of artist that was munificent. He takes those cute props willingly and would pose with his full heart, all to return the love he receives.

Proofreading the document once more, his doorbell rang. Seonghwa walks to the door, even his steps were equally taken, like a prince. He opens the double doors.

“I came here for the Piano”

Bearing his toothpaste commercial worthy smile, Hongjoong stands by the door. Seonghwa who was still feeling the guilt over what he said does not say much but he gestures for the other to come in.

It had been at least a day or two since they got themselves into a mini disagreement. Seonghwa leads the way to the second floor’s east wing. As they arrive to the room, Seonghwa naturally takes the seat to the piano and start’s playing the instrument.

“Yah! Yah! Yah! Yah! Are you playing the piano or are you just pressing the keys? Do you even know how to hold a piano?”

“Not really, and I might not really know musical notes either.”

Seonghwa admits and Hongjoong knew what the other man actually meant. Seonghwa had a big fanbase, but a big fanbase also meant several people who always find fault in him. Hongjoong asked for permission to play the piano and so Seonghwa stands to the side. Gracefully touching each key, Hongjoong plays a familiar tune. It takes the blonde-haired man a moment before he realizes that Hongjoong was playing the mesmerizing piece, ‘[Aurora](https://l.facebook.com/l.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fopen.spotify.com%2Ftrack%2F2J8tamzlBEX2DWLx9ASTvS%3Fsi%3DA6AMWX0mQhyUROLQpX0NvQ%26fbclid%3DIwAR30CuwVIOtPl91JQD65wFms2xh_dC4_54AM84uwwXQTUIJ6z7fFp8FfRbE&h=AT3g47629FhP5psTw7WdM_AG-0BM5t90-yEfNjlGq0-_IAJQTFoJOR6ZDkytgusrcLqeOu5qZ7mT2jgLWXu-hHmQk4cHJp3QYGo-aX4Yx8A5zribMIyVSwTTWWmfyy9EAag)’. He had always found this song very relaxing and assuring.

“Have you ever seen the Aurora Borealis?”

Finishing the first verse, Hongjoong fondly asked.

“No. No I haven’t. When I was on tour, I heard Russia and Sweden can have that beautiful Aurora. But I never once saw it.”

“I haven’t either”

Hongjoong flashes another extraordinary smile, he took note that Seonghwa was someone who needed more sunshine in his life. True enough Seonghwa’s stiff posture somehow loosens. Naturally, it was Seonghwa that calms people, but for now he gets warmth for himself too. 

Curiosity strikes the cat again and Seonghwa asks Hongjoong how he was able to write ‘Aurora’ if he never saw it, further suggesting Hongjoong probably had a lover with alluring green eyes which was probably the song’s muse. The producer was amazed by the Seonghwa’s imagination, but he denies having anyone particular when he created the song. He takes inspiration in life, he explains that ‘Aurora’ was his hopeful dream. To never be afraid when darkness takes over, to never be alone going through life, to see and appreciate that the night may be especially dark so that the Aurora gets to shine more. Seonghwa was awestruck, Hongjoong had never revealed to the public the origin of any of his award winning creations.

“Aurora is really beautiful. It was re-assuring and comforting. Wow! That makes me envious, I hope my music has also brought the same kind of feeling to my fans, despite the fact that I’m not really…”

Hongjoong cuts him off.

“Not really what? Good? You should stop saying that. Maybe you just never found the right song that you felt satisfied with. If it makes you feel any better, I never found a muse for any of my music anyway”

“Well perhaps you just never found the right person.”

They look at each other, and for a brief moment they believed that maybe the cure for despair can easily be purchased from a convenience store.

**\--------**

Both men decided to leave Piano at peace, the double staircase which meets at the middle was a grand sight to see. Hongjoong was being playful and decided to take the left stairs while Seonghwa takes the right side. They steadily meet at the center.

“Can you make my meals again??”

Hongjoong demands. Seonghwa felt a bit timid and amused, but just as his smile was slowly creeping up his lips, Hongjoong blunders another comment.

“You know what, I don’t get why you still dress like you have fans who will see you here. Your shirt! Ugh! Are you also wearing matching Greca Border underwear too?”

Hongjoong harshly says. Seonghwa looks down at himself, he was only wearing a White Crystal Medusa Logo shirt and Barocco Acanthus Print Silk Shorts. It was fairly simple.

“I don’t like how you dress too, your customized clothes? They do not appeal to me! And look at those interlacing C letter earrings you have. Are you in a photoshoot? Why did you even go here if you’ll be disrespecting me?”

Seonghwa sounded like an offended old man, while Hongjoong heartily laughs.

“You cook well and you have a piano here.”

But then Hongjoong’s vision marginally blurred causing him to hold his head. Seonghwa was watchful and immediately held Hongjoong by the arm.

“I’m fine. I am fine. I just got a bit dizzy. This is normal, also it’s time for my medication”

Seonghwa insists that he drives Hongjoong back to the Top Villa but Hongjoong assured the other man that he can handle it from here. With an uneasy heart he chose to let go and trust Hongjoong.

“You can stay at your place and I’ll just cook there. The uphill is a bit too much, even for me.”

The ever-sympathetic artist offers.

“Good Night. See you tomorrow.”

“Good Night. See you tomorrow.”

Both men smiled. Anyway, there was nothing to lose here, a stranger would not care that much right?

**_The night was fair and maybe next time we’ll buy a tub of hope on the nearest 7/11._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was a good day. ATEEZ had 10M views for 24hrs.  
> Let's get to know Seonghwa and Hongjoong in the story.  
> Seonghwa though XD  
> I actually made this to entertain myself but thank you for sharing your time and reading it.


	5. Chapter 5

The sun was not too bad today and it was not too humid either. Cruising down the small road, Hongjoong pressured the other that they explore the island, just as Seonghwa had suggested before. However, Seonghwa quickly rejected the thought and Hongjoong was pretty sure why. He insists and assures the other that he is fine, a little walk ain’t gonna kill him. There was an exceptional garden beside the island’s dining hall, and that is where they were headed. The fair looking prince once mentioned that there were beautiful tropical flowers that he has never seen before. Scanning the garden and its assortment of flora, Hongjoong slides in the wooden chair under a huge white parasol. Seonghwa on the other hand ordered some ice cream.

“Your ominous looking sunglasses looks good on you. Like when you did the Men in Black thing in one of your events.”

Hongjoong comments. Seonghwa could not quite grasp if it was a compliment or Hongjoong was being sarcastic yet again

“Wow, someone went beyond Naver and saw my Halloween photos. Are you joining my fanclub soon?”

Seonghwa teasingly raised his brow, bearing a fatal smirk. They move on to talk about petty things, the music industry, over-delusional fans and styling preferences. They let the mid-afternoon pass by eating some sweets and just simply letting time run like it would never run out.

“I’m pretty sure this island has held numerous weddings in this hall and probably had many married couples spend their honeymoons in the Villas”

Seonghwa notes, sipping on some fresh coconut juice.

“That thought kinda disturbed me. So you mean there were lovers in my bed making love? Ugh.”

“You know what? That attitude is the exact same reason why you don’t have a muse for Aurora.”

Seonghwa was in a good mood to roast someone. While the ever-reverent producer suddenly turned into his stealth mode, defending himself.

“Excuse me? I have a lot of friends, loved ones and admirers in my life.”

It was true though. Hongjoong had numerous professed and silent admirers. He was someone that brings inspiration to a lot of people. Their chit chat moved along and Seonghwa asks Hongjoong about his foundations. Hongjoong’s eyes sparked, he looked like a child eager to tell his stories. He mentions how advocating makes him feel alive. To be able to raise awareness, educate people and help humanity. Hongjoong sounded like a contestant from a pageant, but his words were of pure passion and willingness. He believed that merely living is not enough, you got to live for others too.

“You do it so well. Perfectly to be honest.”

Seonghwa commends that Hongjoong was effective in doing such, his outfits had meaning, his mind and words were always moving, even his polished finger signifies something, and he did so much more of it.

“Have you ever seen how a life is lost?”

Hongjoong suddenly asks before taking another spoonful from his parfait. Seonghwa looks up to the calm sky. He did not know what to say, but he knew how losing life almost feels like.

“I’ve seen how the last breath leaves a person, a number of times. But you just never get used to it, it is terrible. The first one I saw was back when I was eight, I lived in a small neighborhood and there was a kid who lived down the alley. He was a year younger than me. One time I saw him climb one of those metal satellites. The next thing I know he was laying down on the ground. Later on, I learned from my mother that he was severely abused by his family.”

Hongjoong breaths in, seeing such a scene at his early age really dented his faith in humanity. It was one of the reasons why he fears the thought of dying.

“And I’ve also seen so much lives lost because of the lack of opportunity, lack of help and sadly because civilization in itself was already lacking. I did genuinely enjoy all that I have done but there are still a lot more things that life will bring, and I still want to try and do them. I want to help more lives. And with that, honestly I fear seeing death.”

“Here we go again, nothing is ever enough. But you did lead such a meaningful life. I am envious.”

Seonghwa answers back but his mind was wandering over the memory of a good friend of him who also went through child abuse.

“You also probably heard the story of me being capricious and losing my calm over an artist. He wanted me to make a song about depression just because he knows it would give him the numbers. No care just for the likes.”

Hongjoong’s mention of depression triggers another memory.

“I am sure of who I am and how I act, but I terribly despise myself for being sick. I abhor my life because I’m dying.”

Hongjoong’s words further provoke his own. Seonghwa on the other hand was controlling his state of mind. He gulps in, trying to drown his feelings. Not knowing how to respond to such information, he lays down his own thoughts. Hoping his words would come out nonchalantly.

“You know sometimes I’m conflicted whether I am really ready to leave everyone but staying is also a bit too dragging.”

There was an apparent remorse, both felt it. By then, one of the staff approached them.

“Sir the Movie room has already been prepared”

“Mo-movie room?”

Hongjoong asks with a little pout. Seonghwa stands from his chair. Apparently, he had asked to use the Movie room. He wanted to do something different today and a private film showing with a stranger seemed tasteful. The room was not much of a feat, but it did have the basic cinema vibes plus extra comfy La-Z-Boy chairs.

“Pick a movie you want to play.”

Seonghwa asks and to his surprise Hongjoong chose ‘More Than Blue’. He asks Hongjoong if he was sure he wanted to see this movie. The other man affirmed but decided to further ask if Seonghwa would also be comfortable with seeing it. Seonghwa agrees, as long as Hongjoong really wants it. Both men have seen this movie before but not on the year it was released, back then they would not even be teenagers. Seonghwa watched this on one of those long nights at home when he could not sleep while Hongjoong saw this one inflight to one of his travels. The movie is about a terminally ill man who tries to find a husband for his long-time childhood friend. Needless to say, the movie was deep and expresses pensive sadness.

Before they started the movie, two cans filled with popcorn arrived, plain butter and cheese flavored. Hongjoong praises Seonghwa at how he even thought of this.

“Wow, never ending snacks. You must be a pro in dating.”

Hongjoong teases. Seonghwa cleverly smiles back, making Hongjoong question if this was a date. He takes a deep breath and disregarded the thought. The movie was kind of a slow burn, but it had lines that were noteworthy.

“Love is like brushing your teeth”

Seonghwa says along with the character, as if he had memorized the whole movie. He would occasionally dive his hand at the can Hongjoong holds. It could have been a lingering sweet moment if it were not for the fact that Seonghwa ate most of it and it made Hongjoong a little sappy. He barely had his cheese flavored snacks. Seonghwa takes the empty can and exchanged it with the half full butter popcorn.

The movie’s climax was moving and painful all in whirl. Hongjoong felt a pang in his heart and inaudibly teared while Seonghwa was trying his best not to be too worried. Instead, he simply hands a piece of tissue.

The credits roll and they prepare to take their leave, it was just a few minutes past dusk. Seeing how Hongjoong probably started thinking about the movie, Seonghwa played a dance video in the screen and started dancing, very very wildly. Hongjoong looks back and sees the other man enjoying some batshit crazy random dancing, including girl group dances. He could not help but laugh, the sound of which resounds in the room along with the music.

“Is that the Seonghwa people know of? Man are you some crazy shit.”

“I’m quite offended you didn’t like it”

They walk out of the Movie room laughing. Seonghwa urges Hongjoong to dance crazily and just let go. Seonghwa motions for Hongjoong to follow him. He got nothing more but being called crazy. Just then, as Hongjoong was taking the last step down the stairs, he loses his footing. It causes him to stumble forward and hit the flowerpot near him. Seonghwa rapidly ran down to Hongjoong’s side.

“Are you okay? Are you okay? Were you dizzy?”

“No I wasn’t. I just really missed the last step”

Seonghwa moves his eyes to look at Hongjoong’s palm. It was bleeding and for such a simple wound it was bleeding incessantly and excessively. Suddenly, Hongjoong loses his consciousness falling heavily into Seonghwa’s arms.

“Hongjoong! Hongjoong!”

**_They say charity is love in action._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> drama along the way.....  
> Thank you for sharing your time by reading this piece. Please share your thoughts, about Seonghwa or Hongjoong? I love having this kind of Seongjoong feels. hehe  
> Have a great day.


	6. Chapter 6

Seonghwa hurriedly opens the door to the Top Hill Villa before returning to Hongjoong’s side, pushing in the wheelchair. It was almost three in the morning when they returned to the island, it was surely dark and freezing. They had to ride the chartered mini plane as Hongjoong needed to be transported to the nearest hospital. Thankfully, the ride was just less than fifteen minutes. Hongjoong needed a little blood transfusion. For him it was not much of a biggie but for Seonghwa it was very much alarming. Hongjoong insists that he can walk but Seonghwa demanded he stays put. They proceeded to the master bedroom, Seonghwa softly holds Hongjoong to sit by the bed.

“How are you feeling?”

Seonghwa places his hand over Hongjoong’s shoulder, the other simply replied with a weak smile.

“How bad is your condition, really? You need to tell me, so I don’t die earlier than planned because of heart attack.”

Seonghwa was trying to suppress how upset he was, but somehow his tone came off a little too worried and yes, still upset.

“I’m actually in a pretty stable condition. But somehow the cut was still a bit too much even though it wasn’t that deep. Because of course blood loss is something that I should totally avoid. But honestly, my body reacts perfectly to immunosuppressive drugs. I even had a full cycle of treatment before I flew here.”

Hongjoong heavily breaths out.

“But yes, I’ve had setbacks when it gets worse. Okay no, I am not really totally fine. I still need a transplant. But don’t worry I won’t die anytime soon.”

Hongjoong says in one single breath.

“I’m not worried of you dying. We all die at some point. You just can’t go ahead of me.”

"If death is the last appointment then we're all just sitting in the waiting room."

“What are you saying?”

“Sorry I was just singing a line from a song.”

Hongjoong was trying to be relaxed. However, Seonghwa wanted to say more of his feelings. He was unusually probing again. He cannot help it. But more than anything else he cannot help but offer his care.

“Would you want me to accompany you here? I mean just in case you need something.”

Seonghwa lowers himself, both now at eye level. Seeing his reflection on the eyes of the man before him, Hongjoong forces a convincing smile.

“That’s so generous of you. But seriously I won’t be gone by dawn.”

The offer was rejected not only because Hongjoong felt he was becoming a burden, but also with the fact that he does not trust himself if Seonghwa stays.

“Very well then, See you later. If you need anything, you know the number at the Beach Manor right? Press 8 at the end so it goes directly to my bedroom.”

**\--------**

A great battle had to happen before Seonghwa lost to one of Hongjoong’s demands again. In concept, Seonghwa was not really losing arguments but rather he just allows whoever he discusses with to leave with a better peace of mind. Today was the same, Seonghwa gave in but not without a good fight that made them sound like quarreling parents. Hongjoong simply wanted to play the piano, again. Halfway down the road, the cart stopped.

“Oh shit I think I forgot to ask for recharge last night.”

Hongjoong exclaims in annoyance.

“Well then, let’s just walk, The place aint that…”

He was cut off. The dirty blonde-haired prince offers his back.

“No, it’s still a good number of minutes if we walk. Hop in. And you can’t say no or else you don’t get to play the piano.”

Seonghwa was not in for any more discussion this time around. Jumping into Seonghwa’s back, Hongjoong jovially grins. This was quite a contrast from how Seonghwa would be silly and teasing when his friends would joke around and sit on his lap, like he was free property.

“I wonder how much this experience would have dented my bank account if I bought hundreds of your album just to enter for one of your fansigns? I bet no fan has ever tried this royal piggy back ride.”

A producer with a sharp tongue, he must also be fit to be a rapper. Seonghwa suddenly skips, jostling Hongjoong a little higher in the air.

“Yah! You should be careful. The man you are carrying in your back is also the man who has been carrying the whole music industry. I am a very important package!”

“We’ll you are quite a heavy package too.”

Arriving at the manor, Seonghwa went to the kitchen to prepare some refreshments while Hongjoong decided to tour the house. Seonghwa’s place has an old romantic vibe, white walls, ivory accent pieces, huge arched windows, and crystal chandeliers. He walks up the stairs, looking through each room. Before the area of the Piano was Seonghwa’s study room. The door was swung open and so Hongjoong culpably enters. The room felt more modern than the rest of the house, long obsidian black desk, rose gold glass floor lamps, a selection of classical books stored in dark ebony wood shelves and a faux leather chair by the window. Hongjoong was truly impressed on how the island properties are impeccably adorned. The shelves themselves definitely cost a fortune given that only a small percentage of Ebony produce the highest quality of the jet black color. He was first adamant if he should really be spending that much for a healing trip, but he realized that the place is worth the price you pay. By the end of the desk were piles and piles of paper. He never thought Seonghwa does so much administrative work in his career as well. He takes a step to see the view by the window, he could see the bluish green sea. It was exquisitely beautiful. Hongjoong turns around and sees a folder labeled ‘Confidential’ by the side stand.

*Must be his unreleased songs*

He thinks to himself, then he hears Seonghwa calling for him. He quickly moves on to the next room. Hongjoong enters the Piano area and sees Seonghwa playing the instrument free of any concerns. Seonghwa then progressed to sing.

[ _“We can run away from all these things. It only takes courage to let things go. I’m only waiting for a sunny day to leave. Everything behind me as I go…..”_ ](https://open.spotify.com/track/4pDsJFRpM0cMMSCsmaEwT5?si=XqCEAiD5S1q7-BZQ3fDYsA)

He continues to sing, Seonghwa was in his own element. The view more captivating than any of nature’s scenery, it was unearthly. Hongjoong did not move an inch, he did not want this private concert to be disturbed.

“ _Will you please tell me to stay, Just until the rain stops falling”_

Hongjoong has never actually heard the man by the Piano sing in such prowess and emotion. It was especially pleasing to the ears and heartrending to the heart. He sang the song with so much longing, Hongjoong was truly taken.

“You know what, I never really gave much attention to your music but I don’t see the point of people only giving importance to your face”

The awestruck producer broke his silence, walking towards the other man.

“It’s kind of hard to figure out if you are praising me or what. Also, with the fact that I just finished a tour and I am actually in my vacation mode. Plus, I have not actually properly vocalized since the last concert. I couldn’t really be sure how I sounded.”

Seonghwa timidly answers as he moves to the other side of the bench, inviting Hongjoong to sit as well. Hongjoong slides to sit beside Seonghwa.

“I can’t believe you actually think of me with such spite. I was praising you, you stupid.”

“When I started, I lacked so much, I knew I wasn’t good. Right before I debuted I had so much anxiety that I didn’t even want to hear myself sing.”

“You’re also like me. Never satisfied but you take it in differently. But you sing so well. Also singing is not just about the perfect notes. It is also about conveying the message.”

Hongjoong turns to look at Seonghwa offering his picture-perfect smile. Such warmth, it had been long since Seonghwa felt such overwhelming but happy warmth.

**\--------**

The two moved their hang out moments at Seonghwa’s room balcony. Seonghwa has brought some mini tacos and beer. Yes, beer because Hongjoong demanded that he gets to live a little wildly, just a little. Facing the vast sea they stand side by side with the gentle afternoon wind blowing against their cheeks. They talk about Seonghwa’s songs, he had already released two full length albums, three mini albums and had made OST’s for dramas. Hongjoong jumps into his producer mode trying to understand an artist’s genre, style, and discography. Sadly, the artist has never gotten first place for any of his ballads.

“Well just a while ago I was deeply impressed; you sing like the story did happen to you. It was moving. I like it. And this is Kim Hongjoong speaking, Korea’s best producer.”

Hongjoong earns a chuckle from the other man due to his extra confident demeanor.

“Well I guess heartbreak did give me a soul to lay bare while singing”

Seonghwa unconcernedly says to which the other took interest on further digging up.

“Park Seonghwa had a heartbreak? Tell me more.”

Hongjoong grins, placing his face in his palm intently waiting for Seonghwa to say something. It must be the end nearing or the fact that strangers would not really care what you tell them, Seonghwa spoke about a subject he barely ever wants to discuss. In such a volatile industry he is in, he scarcely gets the chance to make friends. His only close friends were one, from his childhood and the other from his high school years. They eventually made it in triple trouble trio.

“But I had to fall in love with one, and ruin it all. I barely saw them after my alcohol intoxicated self decided to confess but ended up walking on my two best friends making out. I started getting mad, I was yelling at them, condemning Wooyoung and San for such, when in fact I too was yearning for the same. The ever-perfect Park Seonghwa ruined it all.”

“So where are they now?”

“Still back in Seoul. I have not spoken to them ever since. Not only because I felt betrayed for not knowing about them but I also felt guilty beyond reasonable doubt that I might have stopped them from being together.”

“So you’re punishing yourself for it? Like this?”

Hongjoong pauses for a second.

“To be honest. I would have never guessed you were under depression. Nothing about you reeks of such.”

What Hongjoong said was unquestionable, depression was not something you readily see in the face of someone. Sometimes it can crawl up and eat you up undetected.

“It’s always easier for me to smile rather than show what I really feel. My life is perfect because I have always played it safe. The only time I risked something, was that drunken moment and yet I ruined it. Just because there is no chaos does not mean it is perfect, I just maneuvered perfectly well from all the cracks.”

Looking towards the sky Seonghwa takes another sip of the beer. Out of the blue, he was enveloped in a pair of adjacent warm arms.

“Sorry I got dizzy”

“Are you?”

“Don’t waste this moment”

Hongjoong passes an alibi, the words of the man before him, he felt it and it gave his heart a little pinch of distress. The whirl of emotions Seonghwa had long bathe himself in, he significantly felt it. Thankfully Hongjoong was actually tender like a hot pack on a winter.

Seonghwa was normally the source of affection for a lot of people. But this warmth was soothing. Placing his arm on Hongjoong’s back, Seonghwa lightly reciprocates the generous gesture.

“Thank You”

**_Silent battles injure the soul deeper._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading. I decided not to delve much into the Hospital scene because I realized I do have a huge issue with being in a hospital. Next chapter is actually my fave, releasing it next week.  
> Hope you had a great day.


	7. Chapter 7

The sun has just risen, the Top Hill Villa looks extra dreamy in the very early morning. All glass windows were up, the cool breeze, the gentle sound of the waves and the extra green indoor plants adding color to the house, Hongjoong smiles to himself. It was indeed a good sunrise. He takes out the milk by the fridge and pours it in a bowl first before placing some cereals. He pauses, and just right at that moment his doorbell rang. Hongjoong knew who it was but he was not expecting him to come this early. He opens the door.

“Good Morning! I hope you haven’t had your breakfast yet.”

Right in front of him was a guy with celestial eyes paired with a smile a bit too bright it actually looks awkward. He had dirty blonde hair and was clad in a T-shirt with Oblique Motif in White Dévoré Jersey. The same guy he called stupid a day ago. Hongjoong raises his eyebrow but the guy only widens his smile.

“I brought some oats and fresh fruits.”

Seonghwa steps inside holding brown paper bags of additional supplies and of what seems to be more than just food.

“Is grocery shopping your most favorite past time after cleaning?”

Dashing to the Kitchen, Hongjoong placed his bowl of cereals in the sink. He did not want to ruin the other man’s extra bright smile by stopping his parade to make breakfast. Hongjoong returns to Seonghwa’s side, leaning by the counter, intently looking at the new stash of goodies Seonghwa brought.

“Would you prefer strawberries or blueberries with your oats?”

“I want some blueberries today.”

Hongjoong replies, looking up at Seonghwa with a warm childish smile. The other had to fight himself but his lips still curved up.

“Why don’t you help me out a bit and set the table in the patio instead? Let us have our meal al fresco style today okay? Hmm?”

That tone, that same irresistible sweet tone that makes everyone obey. Hongjoong pouts but decided to follow anyway. His table arrangement has gotten a tad bit better. After seeing Seonghwa do their table so many times, the eye for table scaping has gotten into his system. But his approach was different, the table exhibits an organic and rustic feel.

“Wow, I’m quite impressed”

Seonghwa walks in wearing his dark tinted sunglasses, with two bowls of oats, handing one to Hongjoong. The Patio was at the highest area of the cliff, beside the infinity pool leading you to the endless sky. It was Seonghwa’s preferred place in Hongjoong’s house. They talk about the little things, how Hongjoong almost lost his laptop, how Seonghwa actually looks like a character from a game and how expensive Seonghwa’s T-Shirt is. Mr. Angry bird averted the allegation by saying Hongjoong’s show stopping Shark Grey Kilt Jacket from last year’s award show was almost five times the worth of what he was wearing. Their cute repartees never ceased but it became part of how they are with each other. 

As the sun was slowly rising higher, the sunlight lightly hits their faces. Hongjoong squints and with ever watchful eyes, Seonghwa takes off his Sunglasses and slides them into Hongjoong’s face. He earns a surprised squawk.

“No dizzy moments allowed, I read sudden strong lights can cause dizziness. And do not be too dramatic, you annoy me.”

“You’re scarier than me to be honest. Your level of kindness is too much. I actually find it questionable”

It was getting warmer indeed.

**\--------**

After lunch time, Hongjoong decided to rummage the remaining brown paper bag at the counter. Inside it were boxes of black hair dye. He calls the other man to come over. Seonghwa who just finished washing the dishes paced towards Hongjoong’s side.

“Why did you buy hair dyes? And black?”

Hongjoong redirects his eyes from the boxes in his hands to the taller man. It takes a minute before Seonghwa opens his mouth.

“Well, like you, I do plan as well. I did not buy them here, I brought them all the way back from Korea.”

Eyes hesitant, Seonghwa takes the boxes of hair dye into his hands as he continues.

“I wanted to look natural, just in case, in case I really do it. So, I thought of coloring my hair back to black before it all. I was hoping if you can help me?”

Seonghwa’s words, it was insouciant but sure. Hongjoong sensed an outpouring grief in his heart. The man before him really wants to lose it all. It dawns on him, the things in the manor, the piles of papers. He swallows as if to take in some courage before he asks.

“What are the documents in the Beach Manor? The folder labeled confidential? What are they?”

With pursed lips, his eyebrow instantly went up.

“My will.”

Seonghwa confesses. Hongjoong takes in a full breath to collect himself. He pitied the man beside him but he also felt at loss at how much this man desires to lose his life. Hongjoong then feebly wrestled a smile, dismissing his thoughts. For once he did not want to ask more questions and receive answers from Seonghwa.

“You know what since you brought so much, why don’t we both change our hair back to black?”

Hongjoong’s mind wanted to berate Seonghwa but he knew better not to push some sensitive buttons when it may also lead to his life getting questioned as well. There was no point in disrupting the system now. Instead, he wanted to make the other feel more comfortable with him.

“Are you sure you want to lose that raspberry head of yours?”

“Well you’ll be surprised at how good I look in dark hair.”

Bringing the dyes to the largest bathroom in the Villa, the two of them take turns being the Hairstylist. It could be the fact that Hongjoong has been doing reconstruction of his clothes and has been painting his nails that he actually does Seonghwa’s hair better. He has managed to dye the prince’s hair with less mistakes and less mess, at the same time his application was also even. However, Seonghwa’s work earned quite several snarls from Hongjoong. The previously red-haired man was able to survive the process but not without traces of the dye in his ears, neck, head and sadly even on the cheek. On some parts at the back you could still see some reddish patches. Seonghwa chuckles, not wanting to let Hongjoong know how bad he did his hair.

“Why are you laughing?”

“Nothing, well you do look nice in black.”

“Honestly you too. Why don’t we take photo together of our new hair?”

Hongjoong jogs to his room, he returns holding a polaroid camera. Seonghwa looks at the item before staring back to Hongjoong, eyes uncertain.

“Are you sure you want a memory of me? What if I …”

Seonghwa was cut off as Hongjoong slings his arm around him.

“What if you don’t? And we all survive? Now just say KIMCHIIII”

Seonghwa puts up a peace sign before following suit what Hongjoong ordered him to do.

“KIMCHIII”

*Click*

\--------

It could be the worry, or it could be more but Seonghwa has been staying in the Top Villa more and more, not just for their shared meals but for shared days. It was growing on them, that one thing which they wanted to detoxify from, human connection. But then again they are strangers anyway. Today, right after lunch Hongjoong fell asleep in the large harbor gray sectional sofa by the living room. Seonghwa sees the tiny man enjoying some time off and with that he decides to do something he loves, cleaning.

He takes the cleaning tools and walks his way to Hongjoong’s mini studio. It’s that one place that surely triggers Seonghwa’s OCD, it’s always cluttered with so much stuff. Used paintbrushes on the counters, paint staining the floor, papers everywhere and a few more artsy tools scattered in different parts of the room. Seonghwa tries his best to remove the stains and declutter the area without making it hard for Hongjoong to find his stuff once he would need them. He takes another look at Hongjoong’s whiteboard filled with so many plans. Other than the heart which he saw before, another thing got him curious. On the other side of the board was a small phrase. Seonghwa reads it out loud.

“Save a life”

The line gained a disapproving laugh from Seonghwa. He thinks Hongjoong’s outlook is just commendable, but it was just too idealistic. However, he gets reminded that Hongjoong has indeed saved a lot of lives because of his causes and foundations that he has been so vocal about. The philanthropical work Hongjoong has been doing really did save lives but knowing Kim Hongjoong, it was not enough. He was insatiable, his achievements will never be sufficient.

After cleaning, Seonghwa carefully checks on Hongjoong. The producer was still asleep. We walks around. Pacing by the patio, Seonghwa takes notice of the calm pool. It was inviting. The clear blue skies were blending seamlessly with the infinity pool. It does not take long for Seonghwa to give in. He sits first, dangling his legs in the tepid water. Then he slowly goes in, examining the space. The feeling of floating, it was a pleasant sensation for Seonghwa. Floating away, it felt comforting. Letting another minute pass, Seonghwa swims closer to the edge, closer to the skies.

He pushes himself out of the water to sit by the edge, he could see the waves below. He starts getting lost in his own thoughts. There were always a lot of things going through his mind. Slowly standing up, he faces the cliff and reaches for the sky. Just then he hears someone shouting, someone was shouting his name. A second later he felt a hand pulling his leg back, with a loud splash Seonghwa falls back to the pool.

“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?? Are you really gonna end your life? Now? Here? Like this?”

Hongjoong hurriedly places Seonghwa in between his arms, enveloping him in hug. He was still voicing profanities out of anger but does not let go. Seonghwa manages to respond with a little laugh. Upon hearing such, Hongjoong releases the hold.

“Are you laughing? You think this is funny?”

Hongjoong was furious, he instantly gets out of the pool, shivering due to the wind. Seonghwa was quick to go after Hongjoong. He grabs a towel beside the lounge chairs and protectively wraps Hongjoong with it.

“I’m terribly sorry, I wasn’t planning on doing it. I mean now and not while you are here. I’m sorry. I was just really lost in my thoughts. I’m sorry I laughed, I didn’t mean to, it’s just that I’m not used to someone caring like that. I’m sorry.”

Seonghwa explains in one single breath while stroking Hongjoong’s arms over the towel. The other man did not say anything. Hongjoong stormed into the house, he was still mad, he felt stupid and he felt annoyed at how much he got scared. He knew all along the man wanted to die and yet he was still surprised. He was not only mad at Seonghwa he was also mad at himself. Following him closely was Seonghwa still apologizing for whatever happened and for startling Hongjoong.

“I’m sorry, I’m really…”

Seonghwa stops as Hongjoong turns back to look at him, eyes welling up with tears.

_*He must have been really frightened*_

Seonghwa thinks. Surely, he enfolded Hongjoong in his arms and tenderly stroked his hair.

“Hongjoong I’m sorry if I scared you. I did not mean to. I would never mean to cause you harm, I’m deeply sorry”

Seonghwa softy says over Hongjoong’s ear, assuring him and giving a little squeeze as they continue their stance. Hongjoong clings into Seonghwa’s shirt, collecting himself, fighting back the tears. It takes another minute or so before they release the hug. Their faces remain close to each other, looking in each other’s eyes they can see their own reflection. Slowly, Hongjoong leans in closer.

Seonghwa closed his eyes. Just as their lips were about to meet, he looks away. He lets out a heavy breath. Hongjoong’s anger surges up again and pushes Seonghwa away.

“You know what? Your entirety is bothersome. You actually gave yourself so much that now you’re too scared to share yourself.”

“Who are you to say such words? With all this pretense of you being benevolent and all. Just so you know, I am not a Charity case and you can’t save everyone, you can’t even save yourself”

[𝅘𝅥𝅯𝅘𝅥𝅮𝅘𝅥𝅲𝆕](https://open.spotify.com/track/3u5bTqHMM1P34ZkbwzdckV?si=7_csniPPRmCKvHAsPz6uNQ)

Hongjoong’s chest heaves up and down. His words were like newly sharpened knives, stabbing deep into Seonghwa’s heart, reaching the hidden emotions he long wished to bury. After hearing this, Seonghwa’s pupils dilated. The celestial eyes were gone. Seonghwa answers back, enraged but in pain. They look at each other with seething eyes before Seonghwa darts for the door. Hongjoong closes his eyes in frustration before hitting the floor letting his feelings out while Seonghwa drives down to the beach manor wiping warm tears falling from his eyes.

[𝅘𝅥𝅯𝅘𝅥𝅮𝅘𝅥𝅲𝆕](https://open.spotify.com/track/0kFmBPYJhvgAqAIZU7RoEh?si=mKljFAyTT3SfjNEj54gUtg)

**_Sharp claws or sharp words?_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was anyone able to guess the papers Seonghwa was working on? Hihi.  
> Also If you'd like to agitate your feels more and listen to the links in the chapters, that would be lovely.  
> Thank you for reading.


	8. Chapter 8

Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner were all tasteless. Hongjoong has been eating whatever food was left in the villa. Most of the time he would eat re-heated food from those previously made by Seonghwa. He was beginning to get irritated with his remaining food choice that he decided to call in for Food Service.

“What’s the number for the food service again?”

Hongjoong wonders before recalling the number which he had not used for quite a while now. The phone rings perpetually, Hongjoong’s mind shifts to think about what happened the last time. He did not really mean to hurt the other man and he knew Seonghwa was not really the kind to hurt anyone as well. Considering Seonghwa’s state of mind, he thought maybe what he said was undeniably too much. But just as the guilt was creeping up to his throat like bile, he then gets reminded of how he leaned closer and got humiliated. His hands unknowingly curl into a fist. By the second time Hongjoong calls for food service someone finally answers.

“Hello? Ah yes, this is from the Top Hill Villa. I’d like to order some food……….. What do you mean?......... Really?........ oh. Ok. Bye”

Hongjoong rolls his eyes. What he heard was severely frustrating. Food service is not available because apparently, Seonghwa had long told them that there will be no need for such. Given that Seonghwa will be cooking for them and he will just need help on procuring groceries. Hongjoong loved how the lady mentioned that Seonghwa will be making their meals from now on. But looking at how he is left with few cooked foods, his mood shifts to being annoyed again. He goes on to the kitchen. Looking through the fridge and the remaining stash, sausage and egg seemed like the easiest and safest choice. And even with such simple food, Hongjoong managed to burn parts of it. He still ate them, he had not much of a choice.

The weather was quite cold on that day, the sun barely gave that loving sunlight in the morning, the blue sky was kind of miserly hiding behind the clouds, and the breeze was howling in a chilly tone. By midday Hongjoong takes his Ipad Pro to lounge by the pool. Although he promised not to work on any songs, he wanted to take note of these overwhelming feelings. That maybe one day he could write something to tell of these foreign emotions. Writing his thoughts, his mind started wandering again. Soon enough he finds himself unknowingly watching a video of Seonghwa on one of his fansigns where he is surrounded by so much toothless toys. He could not help but laugh, the man on the video was both cringey and cute, but all in all he was terribly adorable. Hongjoong looks forward, the sky was not blending well with the endless pool today. He swallows as if to calm himself, remembering the fear as he saw Seonghwa standing at the edge of the pool. Hongjoong really thought he was gonna witness another life lost before him. He slowly laid himself in the lounge chairs, closing his eyes and adjusting himself to feel comfortable. Just then Hongjoong felt something beneath the chair’s mattress.

**\--------**

It was uncommonly frigid down at the beach manor, all possible things that can be considered as a window were open. The cold air was cruising through the halls that Seonghwa did not even need to turn on the AC. Devil may care or not, he opened the Armand de Brignac Ace of Spades Trilogie set he brought all the way from Korea. He promised he will waste some good money on some not too useful things on his twilight days. Seonghwa uncaps all three bottles of Gold, Silver and Rose Brut, pretending like he was actually fond of such drinks. He pours each portion of it in a crystal goblet as he luxuriates by the entertainment room. Feeling a little too sentimental and impatient, he decided to review his past music videos. Sipping on his drink or rather drinks, he reminisces on all the fun and happy memories he had working on each album, each song and each production. They were indeed priceless, all wrapped with amazing experiences. He then comes across his cover of ‘The Story Never Ends’.

[ _“Wound me like a toy spinning too fast_ ](https://www.instagram.com/tv/CAmuL9PJWfg/)   
[ _In every direction_ ](https://www.instagram.com/tv/CAmuL9PJWfg/)   
[ _How, how could I stay when you lit a match to all my intentions?”_ ](https://www.instagram.com/tv/CAmuL9PJWfg/)

Listening to his own melancholic voice, his eyes suddenly felt blurry. Tears just started falling, heavily, like they were not going to abate. Seonghwa raised his legs, hugging them close to lay rest his face. It had been ages since he felt this miserable. He hardly ever cries like this, but this keening only meant one thing. It was a relapse, a very dreadful one. Seonghwa hugs himself a little tighter, trying his hardest to steady his breath only to let out another desolated wail.

“Keep it together. Please, it is not a good time. Seonghwa, not now. Please, just a little more. Jebal.”

He whispers, doing his utmost convince himself. His tears seemed endless while his sobs sounded unbearable. Usually his breakdowns last for at least an hour or so, that is if he was previously in a good condition, longer on some episodes. Even when he struggles, he wanted to be attentive with his tasks and work that he has only allowed himself to break and let it all out for a certain period of time. Seonghwa has been suppressing all his breakdowns by limiting his time to cry. Impossible but he makes it. He was that responsible. On most days he wishes someone can just pull him out of his black hole, save him and tell him it is okay. But he too knows very well that such things never really helped. They were just mere empty words.

This relapse took him at least two hours and a half to come down from his anxiety. Wiping the remaining fallen tears in his cheeks, he quickly goes to his room to take some of his prescribed meds. And just like that he snaps back as if he was not grappling for his stability a while ago. This was the same reason that those who knew he had depression could not believe it. The ever dependable Seonghwa who always got it under control and seemed perfectly normal, never showed a hint that he was depressed. And he was tired of this exact state, being okay, then losing it, then he makes it okay only to break again at some point. He opens the fridge in his room to take another bottle of water, regaining his composure. Seonghwa took his biggest luggage, dragging it down to the first floor of the manor. Taking in the last steps of the stairs, the doorbell rang.

“Oh, I said they should stop by tomorrow to fix the…”

He places his suitcase to the side before opening the door.

“I came here for the Piano.”

Bearing his toothpaste commercial worthy smile, Hongjoong stands at the door. Seonghwa who was still feeling the guilt over what he said does not say much but he gestures for the other to come in. Hongjoong steps in, clothed in white Grosgrain Placket Oxford shirt and black Cotton Poplin trousers. Hongjoong’s eyes were sunken, his face was a bit more contoured than usual. Both bashfully looked at each other, then progresses to look away.

“Actually, I’m not only here for the piano. You left your sunglasses in the chairs by the pool. I almost broke it when I sat there.”

Hongjoong nervously hands the sunglasses, hoping his alibi was convincing. He notices the suitcases by the door and his heart instantly felt slightly lighter.

“Are you going back already?”

There was a sudden jolt of joy in his tone, wondering if Seonghwa has already foregone the main intention into coming into the island. Seonghwa glances to his suitcases.

“Oh, those suitcases? Well my booking in this island ends in seven days. I am just preparing, for whatever. My clothes are as you know, are quite a treasure. They should at least go to someone or be sold off to help someone’s foundation.”

“Well that only means I leave earlier than you. I leave in five days.”

“Let me lead you to the Piano.”

Seonghwa does not comment on Hongjoong’s words. He did not know what to do with such information. Five days he thinks to himself. Instead, he brings Hongjoong to the piano as if the other man does not know where it actually is. Seonghwa leans by the farthest wall and looks the other way as Hongjoong slides in to sit at the piano bench. He started singing.

[ _“I finally went out after a long time.”_ ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PetGmGtiSN0)

Hongjoong presses the first key of the song and continues.

_“The familiar street._

_The familiar restaurants_

_I tried to avoid to forget you.”_

Seonghwa recalls that this is a song of Yoon Jongshin. Finally, he turns his head to look at the now black-haired man playing the piano. His heart somehow softens, he could not deny that he was yearning for Hongjoong. But Hongjoong was terribly right, Seonghwa was a coward. He was certainly scared to share himself, doing so is nothing but a futile endeavor in life.

_“I have nothing more to say with the empty seat_

_So I take my steps back up the path I came”_

Hongjoong proudly finishes the song. He slowly turns, looking into Seonghwa’s direction. Taking one anxious step at a time, he stands by the other man’s side.

“I’m sorry I said such words.”

The ill tempered shortie was nowhere to be felt. Hongjoong has always been sure of himself that it was so rare that he is placed in a position to apologize. Even though he knew that he was also hurt, he took the courage to admit he was wrong.

“I’m deeply sorry too.”

Seonghwa raises his eyes to look at Hongjoong. Both their eyes were shaking, anxious and full of regret.

“I’m sorry for what I said. I hope that didn’t cause you some trouble.”

All the while Hongjoong was dead worried Seonghwa’s mental health would further worsen because of the things he said.

“I’m fine. You do not need to worry. I also did not mean to fire back at you like that. I’m really sorry.”

And although it was a sure hit that Seonghwa got a relapse, for Seonghwa it was fine. He only has seven days to stay in the island anyway, he can make it.

Hongjoong flashes yet again his perfectly proportioned smile and Seonghwa gladly reciprocates. A few more words of apology and a little more as an assurance and they both understand how it is going to be. They respect each other’s decision; one can only be responsible for their own life. Although both were hurt, both are scared, and both of them aren’t entirely sure how the remaining days will unfold but they both felt one thing was indisputable.

“I cannot take why you are dressed like that.”

Seonghwa laughs which earns him a snicker from the delightful man beside him.

“Okay, there was an important video call meeting that cannot be rescheduled, I had to look at least a bit professional.”

Mr. Producer defends himself with a pout.

“Well you do look great in white with that new black hair of yours.”

Seonghwa’s compliment gets a shy chuckle from Hongjoong. He breaths in a huge breath, mustering up all his remaining sanity, before he dives in for a warm hug. Hongjoong was quite surprised but there was no apparent need to retaliate this time.

“Hongjoong.”

Seonghwa gently rests his head over Hongjoong’s shoulder while Hongjoong counters back interlacing his fingers, wrapping his arms around Seonghwa’s waist. They breath in each other’s scent, the tenderness was soothing. Despite the chilly condition, their hearts remain warm. The embrace was long, like they meant to make it up for all the meals they failed to share and for all the banters they missed.

Seonghwa kindly releases his hold. Fear causes us to stop ourselves from trying and achieving things. It places us in yesterday’s box and takes us away from the gift of present.

_*Be free*_

Seonghwa could hear his inner self. He moves his hands to cup Hongjoong’s face before he finally, fearlessly plunges in for the long-postponed kiss.

Nothing is promised in life but for now they were sure of one thing, their love.

**\--------**

Seonghwa insists on driving Hongjoong back to the Top Hill Villa. Slowly turning the wheels on a curve, he steals a loving glance. Hongjoong looks beautiful under the starry night sky. They pull up at the front door, hands bravely entwined.

“This means we aren’t strangers anymore right?”

Hongjoong jokingly says.

“I think you have long memorized my public information. I guess we’re pass Naver info level”

Seonghwa lightly squeezes the other man’s hand causing a flush of red to creep into Hongjoong’s face.

“I might have been selfish that day I barged in here. I wanted some human interaction before the last beautiful sunset appears. Gathering all my courage to come here that day was worth it. It made me want to see that hopeful sunrise you once mentioned.”

This time it was not because the end was apparent that Seonghwa was unusually saying his feelings.

“I’m forever indebted to you. You saved me from having to eat tasteless meals.”

They both laugh. Hongjoong continues.

“But seriously, thank you. Seonghwa, Thank you.”

Silence falls as they try to drag a few more seconds given the night is aging. Seonghwa releases Hongjoong’s hand, bidding a good night.

“Do you wanna stay here for the night? I mean what if I need help?”

Hongjoong abruptly says, the flush or red deepening in his cheeks. Seonghwa delicately runs his fingers through his hair and puts on a devilish grin.

“Maybe I should watch over you tonight.”

_**A valorous leap takes you to places and warm arms you surely deserve.** _

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank You for reading another chapter of Time of Day.  
> If you would have noticed I had to make a reference to Hongjoong's Personal Content: ATEEZ(에이티즈) BY. HONGJOONG #4 – 모처럼 (Original. 윤종신).  
> I just love how he sang that song. Hence the need to have a piano in Seonghwa's Beach Manor.
> 
> Again Thank you! Have a great and blessed day.


	9. Chapter 9

The window blinds by the vast living room were left unrolled overnight. The pitch black color hurls across the sky. It was a quarter past five in the morning when Hongjoong woke up. Gently opening his eyes, the first thing he realized was that he fell asleep in the couch; second thing, his bed comforters are thankfully with him; third thing, an arm is resting by his waist; fourth thing, he wasn’t clothed at all. He slowly turns around to see the fifth thing. Charmingly sleeping right beside him was Seonghwa, deprived of all the luxurious designer clothes he always sports. Hongjoong moves closer, tucking his face into the inner part of Seonghwa’s neck. He forces himself to go back to sleep, this kind of sleeping set up was better than any five star hotel he has been on. But he was too elated that he remained awake listening to Seonghwa’s cutesy little snores.

A few more minutes and the dark cast were magnificently turning gold. Rays of light crawling up to their little nest. It was a like a frame straight out of a movie. Hongjoong carefully lifts his head up, looking into the full panoramic view of the sky. It was finally, thankfully sunrise. He looks back at the captivating man in his arms.

“A hopeful sunrise”

Hongjoong tilts down his head for a shy peck. Seonghwa surprisingly lets his lips curl up for a mischievous smile.

“Couldn’t resist?”

Wriggling his eyebrows, Seonghwa opens his eyes. Those provocative yet fragile pair of eyes. Hongjoong lightly hits him.

“Why do you love to ruin such moments?”

Hongjoong raises his hand for another attack, only to fail as Seonghwa quickly seizes Hongjoong back down into the sofa. Immersing themselves for yet another round of cuddling, Seonghwa places his head over the smaller man’s sculpted chest. Who would’ve have thought that all this time Hongjoong was hiding such a rare marble under his shirt? The flawless Park Seonghwa rests his being on the ever so esteemed Kim Hongjoong. If the industry knew about this, about them, a lot would probably detest this unlikely but powerful pair. Although some would probably offer them much compliments. And It could be the marvelous night they shared or the beautiful scenery outside the window that their taunting remarks felt out of place for now.

“It isn’t a secret that people admire you and fear you because you’re you. However, I realized Kim Hongjoong is also sweet, yet Pyscho. Quite annoying and a bit mercurial as well but just the way I like it.”

Seonghwa sweetly says, drawing a heart with his finger over the other’s proud torso. Hongjoong lightly moves out a few strands of hair from Seonghwa’s eyes.

“I’m not so sure if that was a compliment or what. But I hope you know; you have this undeniable thing that people can’t help but gravitate towards you. You bring comfort to people and can you please stop saying that you only have a pretty face. It’s very apparent that people follow you because you have a heart.”

“I don’t think most people see that.”

That is true, Seonghwa is not sure how the people in his life feel about him, especially after finding out the state of his mental health. The rebuttal makes Hongjoong scoff, he was never a fan of how the other man was always skeptical of himself.

“One of your nicknames is Mars, right? Mars in Greek culture was identified as Ares, he was perceived as a devastating and destabilizing force. While in ancient Roman mytholohy, Mars was the god of war yet he is seen as a military power that secures peace. People may perceive you differently but that does not invalidate you of who you truly are. And the Seonghwa I met is admirable, caring and yes very, very, handsome.”

Hongjoong tenderly strokes Seonghwa’s head, then ruffling the hair by the crown.

“So does that make you my Venus?”

Seonghwa’s sinister smirk reappears. Hongjoong shrugs it off with a boisterous laugh.

“I’m not sure I want to be an allegory with those two. I mean Venus and Mars also led an adulterous life. I’m not really in for something like that.”

Hongjoong’s mood was so bright that the sunrise could not compete with his luster. They bask in the soft early morning rays, playfully and lovingly enjoying each other’s warmth.

**\--------**

Mornings were clearer and way more lighter, it had been days since daybreak have been more hopeful. There was undeniably more to look forward to, each remaining day had to be spent to the fullest. The cute banters, the artsy table scaping, whimsical piano sessions, and imprudent cuddling; it all felt like a routine they have been sharing for years.

It was past cocktail hour when Hongjoong woke up from his nap. He opens his eyes, long lashes moving to look at the man with dark side swept fringe.

“You’re finally awake”

Leaving a soft kiss over Hongjoong’s forehead, Seonghwa holds him close.

“Would you want to have a picnic with me by the beach?”

That same sweet, caring tone that melts your heart. Hongjoong nods with a slight smile, still a bit tired and sleepy. While Hongjoong was asleep, Seonghwa has been preparing a wicker basket packed with snacks and the remaining Ace of Spades he opened back in the Manor. He had always wanted to try going on a picnic. Plus, today should be lived to the fullest because once the sun rises tomorrow Hongjoong has to fly back.

It took them a little bit longer before they got out of the Top Hill Villa as Hongjoong was feeling a bit sluggish. Seonghwa suggested they postpone the picnic but Hongjoong insisted he can manage.

Both of them lounge by beach area, right at the front of the Manor. It was already late afternoon, but they still went on to take their snacks. This means dinner will come a bit later tonight. As usual, even the beach mat and the food had to be arranged in Seonghwa’s way. Hongjoong casually sits in between the other man’s legs, leaning his back to rest against Seonghwa’s chest.

“This is extra comfortable.”

Hongjoong confesses as he excitedly feeds Seonghwa a piece of green grape. Seonghwa unhurriedly places his arms along Hongjoong’s waist, giving a little nip. They talk about petty things, Hongjoong’s dislike for spicy food even if he was Korean, Seonghwa’s hate for bitter things. They also started getting pettier over the fact that Hongjoong always wears bright shorts with tucked in T-shirts. Seonghwa rolls his eyes, as it does make Hongjoong look like a grade schooler. These little things, bits of personal information they exchange. They are indeed way past strangers stage. As the weather was getting low, their conversations shift deeper as well. Telling a stranger about your issues without knowing whether they have judged you or not feels good; but stripping your thoughts to lay naked before someone you care about sets your soul free.

“To be honest I wasn’t expecting to make it this far.”

Seonghwa’s sudden revelation still sends a pinch to Hongjoong’s heart. Hongjoong positions his hand above Seonghwa’s, a gesture of affirmation. He takes a deep breath before addressing his feelings.

“Some say the darkest time of day is right before dawn. Well that is not true though but that time before the sun rises is what I am most worried of. You know that I long for the sunrise very much right?”

Hongjoong feels Seonghwa’s nod as he carries on.

“I long for the sunrise because if the night passes, I cannot be sure if I can have another chance to see the rising sun. What if I never wake up?”

He tenderly runs his thumb over the back of Seonghwa’s hand. Seonghwa felt the guilt, what if he can just give away his life to the man he holds dearly? His thoughts take a round of overthinking. But that idea or wish was far from possible.

“If you love the sunrise, I on the other hand am thankful for the sunset. When I see the sunset, I feel like I get a pat on the head, that I did a good job. Like I managed to continue life. But until when?”

Seonghwa pressed his face at the back of Hongjoong’s head, lightly kissing his hair. Hongjoong silently wishes he can be the reason Seonghwa stays to get more head pats, to see more sunsets and to share their life. But that was never his call. He knew that very well. They lay still adoring the breathtaking view. In a twinkling of an eye, the sun has begun to set, the brightly blanketed sky was slowly turning gold. Rays of light crawling up to their little nest. They both take part of this precious moment letting the golden light trickle unto their skin. Hongjoong, with his drowsy eyes, tips his head to the right and Seonghwa took it as sign. He leans in to reciprocate.

“A meaningful sunset.”

Seonghwa breaths out such words. If you look at it closely, sunrise and sunset look quite analogous to each other. It could be a matter of perception if it were the end or it was a new beginning. Just as the scene was getting more lovely, mother nature had to cut them off with an unforeseen aggravating rain. The raindrops started falling fast, they were huge but the rainfall wasn’t heavy. Seonghwa did not care for any of the picnic items. Without any delay, he took out a Logo Stripe Scarf to cover Hongjoong, holding him close as they dart for the Manor’s foyer.

“Wow even your scarf is Balmain, do you only ever wear designer clothes? You remind me so much of the singer Choi Jongho. Do you also own a Louis Vuitton Keepall?”

Hongjoong quips, just like a puppy he shakes the drops of rain that managed to fall on him. He turns to look at Seonghwa who looked like a drenched cat. A laugh escapes his lips.

“You look like a black cat that just came out of a bath”

With Hongjoong’s words the other man grabs his soaked shirt and flings it to the ground. Hongjoong takes a moment to process the view.

“Let’s stay, just until the rain stops falling”

Staying. But not too long.

**\--------**

Inevitable mornings come because time never stops for anyone. Most of us take the courage to do something when a sunny day passes along. Both wearing their dark hued sunglasses, Seonghwa and Hongjoong stands by the reception. Their hands valiantly entwined. The front desk staff looks at them with a puzzled expression, considering how these two were acting hostile more than a month ago. Hongjoong places the key to the Top Hill Villa at the desk while the staff has started loading his suitcases in the van.

“Now the island is really booked only for me. I want you out of this island so you can continue your purpose.”

That kindhearted smile, Seonghwa’s care never really stops. Hongjoong sighs, hesitating to answer back. Dubious to take liability, well if there was anything to own up to in the first place. But there was no point in holding back anymore, there was none.

“You do know that we do have the option to leave this place together right?”

“I know, but both of us can’t really take full responsibility for what we have now. Nothing is sure. You know that as well. Thank you though, those were really brave words. But I also know that you respect me, and probably somehow trust me.”

Hongjoong was trying to extend his hopeful wishes. And even at his own choice of words he knew it was a precarious alternative. He could die and leave Seonghwa behind with a bigger wound and in deeper pain. His life was ending anyway. Hongjoong cannot afford to let Seonghwa endure that kind of reality. And Seonghwa knew the offer was great but to risk going for something great when he cannot even help himself, when chasing the sunset was an everyday struggle that not everyone understands. Everything that happened in the island was of good memory for him. However, for Seonghwa the future remains dark. He can let Hongjoong hold him now but for what? To cause a bigger relapse and wreck it all again.

“You’re right. We should love ourselves first before we share that love. We need to trust ourselves before we can take on the responsibility of a life with someone else.”

Surprised that we was disappointed over what he heard, Hongjoong still had to accept Seonghwa’s choice. He fully understands his point.

“If we can’t live for ourselves, we can’t live for other people as well.”

Removing his sunglasses, Seonghwa tightens the grip on Hongjoong’s hand. He knew his own words were hard to heed and there was no promise to make. Hongjoong moves to the reception and takes out his black card.

“I made a deposit, in the next summer we’ll meet here again. If we have already found that love in ourselves”

Hongjoong’s second offer was inviting. The chances are truly many, and life could possibly grant them more of it. He goes in for a long warm hug.

“사랑해 성화”

“사랑 해요 홍중”

_**Today was a gift, that is why we call it present.** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are nearing the end.  
> and I still have so much Seongjeong feels.  
> It was a great day nevertheless, we won for Immortal Songs. ATEEZ is truly one of a kind.  
> Congratz boys, that was phenomenal.


	10. Chapter 10

Sunny skies fabricated with pure cottony clouds, blue hues painted across and closer to the horizon the sky fades to a lighter blue or white. Such colors appease your feelings and at the same time excites you for what you can expect next. We all love to do bold things on a bright and budding day. It was both humid and hot, this year’s tropical summer seems to be more sweltering than the past year. The greenery has also grown, taller and wider. Nothing ever stays the same, even the waves were dancing on such a varying note. In a span of a short time many things can happen, we can lose and acquire so much in life.

A man, in heavily tinted sunglasses steps down from a white van, while the staff unloads a few luggage coated in chrome and silver. He looks around, anxiously taking a series of deep breaths. It has been a short but eventful year. He has been waiting for this chance, if there was really another chance to begin with. He keenly paces to the front desk, asking for the key. It took him an immense amount of self-control not to ask the receptionist if anyone has arrived before him. But he knew too well that asking for such was a big leap he did not want to take right there and then.

Driving to the residence, he somehow silently sings to himself.

*Hakuna Matata ya*

He wanted to make himself believe in such a line. ‘There are no troubles’. Indeed, there should be no troubles. But the apprehension was up his throat, it was suffocating, it was in his veins and even pounding hard against his chest. The only thing that could clear his heavy breath would be the reality of seeing the same man he saw in this island a year ago. But how do you stay positive when all you have left fighting to believe is your heart?

He gently places the key at the door. Turning the knob, his prayer was growing more and more desperate.

*Please just this once, grant me this*

The door swings wide open. The view was still breathtaking, by the open living room is the lovely scenery of the vast sky. Maybe some beautiful things stay the same, just like these astounding heavens. His eyes scan the area. Left and right, not a single trace of life passed here. Lightly treading, he places a hand over the couch that held heartwarming moments. The foolish cuddles, the warm nights, and the hopeful sunrise, they were all encapsulated in this spot. He walks to the kitchen, this part of the house made him feel what marriage would have felt. The banters, the chores they shared and the meals they had; they were all part of the past he very much wanted to relive. His feet led him next to the studio, this room made all the great plans. He looks to the side of the wall that once had the white board marker and the distractingly huge heart drawn on one side.

He returns to the living room to fetch his suitcases but could not bring himself to drag them to the room. Instead, he props down the sofa and curls up for a momentary comfort.

**\--------**

In the morning when the sunlight has hardly risen, the man goes on to the Kitchen aiming for one decent breakfast. Opening the fridge, he realizes there was still no food to begin with. He didn’t want to stock up on so much food for himself. With such he dials in for food service, he knew the food in the island was not at par with the beautiful place but there was no choice. It had been a week since he arrived. His prayers never ceased, he was still positive, things can happen. In the early morning he either goes adoring the view of the island, the flowers by the garden, or the fine white sand by the beach. Right after lunch, he spends his time reading a book. There was so much to learn, he was eager to keep going. For this particular day he was reading Paulo Coelho’s Book, ‘Adultery’. As compelling at the book’s title, the storyline was also quite interesting. It details the life of a woman who seemingly ends up in the brink of depression.

_“Life offers us thousands of opportunities for learning. Every man and every woman, in every day of our lives, always has a good opportunity to surrender to Love. Life is not a long vacation, but a constant learning process. And the most important lesson is learning to love”_

He reads such lines like it was a passage meant to remind him how far he has gone and how far he wishes to continue. His life has indeed taken him to places he would not have taken if he weren’t in this same island a year ago. It was a silent year for him, but it was the kind of silence that allowed him to rediscover his core. Every day is a battle we all fight our way in, aiming to survive and make it through for another sunrise. A never-ending boring cycle only made worthwhile because we choose to love and we continue to learn to love, ourselves, the people we are with and to love life itself.

He rests by the hanging spherical glass chair, cooping up with the fluffy mattress. He lets his mind go blank, being alone in this place has been tiring. Laying still for a long period and he could just go on. He could just sit here and wait for a beautiful sunset. But he did not need to see one, his beautiful sunset already happened, and it was not his last. Besides, it was just ten minutes past twelve noon, it would be a waste to spend six hours just spacing out. Seonghwa stands up from the chair and turns to proceed to the studio.

He stops. Like there was a bear in the living room, he remains frozen. Standing before him at high noon was a blue-haired man. Kim Hongjoong in all his glory with eyes brimming with tears paired with a commercial worthy smile holds ground in front of the prince like Park Seonghwa.

**\--------**

_Three weeks week ago._

The phone has been ringing nonstop. There was about at least a dozen missed calls and an alarming number of text messages. Since yesterday, Hongjoong has been locked up in his studio working on the final demo piece for a song he made. His phone buzzes again and this time he finally answers it.

“Yes, yes. I am almost done. Yes, yes I will rest for today.”

Hongjoong utters in annoyance. Tomorrow was indeed a crucial day. As soon as he puts down the call, he goes into Naver. Typing in ‘Park Seonghwa’, hoping an article would pop up. There was none. It is almost a year since he left the island resort and he has not heard about him ever since. He could’ve have proceeded with his objective as to why he was there, or he could have made a bigger goal to meet again a year later.

Hongjoong returns to his apartment, taking out a huge suitcase from the stock room. He starts to pack up for the day ahead.

“I’m really gonna be late. I hope they don’t forfeit the deposit”

He smiles to himself; he needs to stay positive. He isn’t Kim Hongjoong if he dreams small. They will meet again. After packing his stuff, he props himself in front of the laptop. Placing in the files as an attachment, he read the title again before hitting send.

“MARS”

Hongjoong misses his first schedule to fly back to the island as he needed to reschedule for something pivotal to his life. He finally has a matched donor, at last he is getting a transplant. He does not hate his state anymore. Hongjoong is about to get better. However, with this gift, it meant he won’t be back in the island right on time. He will have to stay in longer in the Hospital. If Seonghwa was there, he would have left.

**\--------**

_Present_

Nevertheless, Hongjoong flew in as soon as he got the go signal from the doctors to take a five-hour flight. The first thing he did was dart to the Beach Manor, it was empty, but the piano was still there. The fond memories remain. This was not the kind of reality he wished. Driving up to the Top Hill Villa, Hongjoong could not control his sobs anymore. He was so happy to get better and live more. He was so excited to share his new life with Seonghwa. That was the dream, that was his plan.

He gently places the key at the door.

With a heavy heart he places the key on the door and to his surprise it was not locked. Turning the knob, he started a series of prayers. He walks in, and the very first thing his eyes laid rest on was the man with Ash Grey hair sitting in his favorite spherical chair. He steadily comes closer. And just as they were about two meters apart the man turns around.

He stops. Like there was an angel that just graced the area, he remains stunned. Standing before him at high noon, eyes starting to get blurry with tears, was the same man he saw a year ago. Park Seonghwa with his celestial pair of eyes was positioned right in front of the highly admired Kim Hongjoong.

They meet at a [_time of day_](https://open.spotify.com/track/00D1CbXY8vFxXEmndW6CkB?si=RCezE8FXTc2gvBKbxV5CXw) in the middle of sunrise and sunset where their love perfectly meets each other.

Seonghwa runs to hold Hongjoong close, his being detaining his loved one in his arms. On usual occasions he was the type to spin someone around out of Happiness. Hongjoong locks his arms around the other man, like his life depended on it, like this was the only thing his life ever wanted to hold. By now Seonghwa’s BB T-shirt have been drenched with Hongjoong’s tears. They hold each other for a long moment, trying to make sure that this was not a dream. That reality can really be far better than any dream. Seonghwa was the first to break the long embrace, he placed both his hands at Hongjoong’s shoulders. Giving a reassured smile, he finally says a word.

“I guess this means we both learned how to love ourselves.”

“Not just ourselves, our own lives as well. I guess we can now share it with someone else.”

Hongjoong brushes away the tear falling from Seonghwa’s alluring eyes. Seonghwa did not take a moment to hesitate and replaced the perfectly proportioned smile of Hongjoong with his own pair of lips.

“You saved a life Hongjoong.”

“No, you just learned how to save yourself”

_**Time of day.** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was super fun writing this. I initially didn't plan to end this on such a happy ending. However I realized we all need a little ray of hope and I couldn't bring Seonghwa to perish like how I wanted it to be. I wanted a positive mood that could remind me or anyone who read this that in the future if we ever feel like there were no more reasons to keep going, we should be reminded of our love for ourselves and the chances we can still have in the journey ahead. As I told myself before when I was in a brink of a bad phase "Life is still worth living" and I'm so glad I believed that because it turned out that it was worth it all.
> 
> In writing this story I have been listening to this playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3fbIZn6RuJDJJSbIvOO9uR?si=1rc7uBmNTK2cDCg_o35m-Q
> 
> As I find them quite fitting to the story. Also I hope you noticed the hyperlinks along the chapters. These are the songs contained in the playlist.
> 
> This has been your fangirl friend, the Little Mermaid of 1837. Signing off for Time of Day. Thank You so much for reading. Please leave some comments if you ever have thoughts.
> 
> P.S. Winter Yield, which is a story revolving on WooSan will be available on October 16. If you're curious how things happened and how it went with their Seonghwa Hyung, or in case you need some more SeongJoong crumbs over Time of Day maybe you'd get more there. Again my heartfelt thank you for reading Time Of Day.


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